In some ways, I have to hand it to Bunter Johnson. As soon as he came into power, he began surrounding himself with hapless fools and incompetents. It seems now as though no matter how incompetent or even corrupt a cabinet minister proves to be, it is almost impossible for them to be sacked.

Home Secretary, Priti Patel broke the ministerial code but remains in her job despite having been previously fired for the same sort of thing by Theresa Maybe.

Communities Secretary, Robert Jenrick signed off a building development shortly after accepting a donation from the company in question and is still in place.

Gavin Williamson lurches from one disaster to another yet inexplicably remains as Education Secretary.

Even when the Prime Minister privately admits you are completely hopeless, as in the case of Mathew Hancock, he keeps you in place.

The bar for this Cabinet is so low that even the totally useless and thrice-sacked Chris Grayling would be regarded as an impressive inclusion.

 I fear that Bunter J has such a cynical disregard for we suckers who voted him into power that he does not care that he is allowing the country to be run by people who are not up to the task.

This is partly because chaos suits him. In a cabinet of blunderers and incompetents, he not only looks good by comparison but people turn to him to see who is in charge.

Voters have yet to abandon this jury-rigged ship of state crewed by lackeys and conscripts and for the moment, remain thankful for the furlough scheme and the vaccine roll out.

Yet that may change as more items are added to the charge sheet and the gratitude for the jabs starts to fade. A lot of people will look at the current cabinet and think God help us! But Bunter knew exactly what he was doing when he appointed them. At the last election, the Tories had such a massive majority he thought they were untouchable. He is basically a weak man so has surrounded himself with people weaker and less convincing than he is. But with the excrement starting to hit the fan and the party reputation sinking faster than the Titanic, he has a boat load of scapegoats he can pass the blame onto before he has to accept it himself.

According to the latest snippet from the angry Dominic Cummings, Bunter allegedly plans to step down after the next election in any case, having told his mates that the job is like ‘pulling a jumbo jet down the runway.’ Apparently, he is hankering ‘go back to writing, make money and have fun.’ That has to be bad news for his new bride because we all know exactly what his idea of ‘having fun’ is. Look out for more little Bunters dotted around London and the Home Counties.

Thanks to Cummings’ somewhat spiteful revelations, we also know that just weeks into the pandemic, our Revered Leader was describing Mathew Hancock as ‘totally f***ing hopeless’ and begging his Svengali: ‘WTF do we do?’ Yet even now, after nearly a hundred and thirty thousand deaths and fifteen months on from the start of the nightmare that envelops us all, Ten Downing Street sources insist that the Bunter J has ‘full confidence’ in his Health Secretary.

Only today, there are reports that Hancock held back an NHS document that painted a far more benign picture of the current situation from the ‘gang of four’ who are running the nation – a document that might well have allowed the original ‘Freedom Day’ (tomorrow would you believe) to go ahead as planned.

So what is going on and surely it is time for that official enquiry to go ahead? This has gone on too long and heads have to roll I am afraid, even if the main one to come off looks like a potato in a blond wig.